Is Getting Married Young a Good Idea?

Story! Story!

Once upon a time, there was this hare by the name Waghaghu. While making strolls through the fields, she came the wide River Kiluma. She wanted to cross it. Various thoughts slipped, what if the waters are too deep for me? What if I drown? Maybe a crocodile will swallow me. Will that be God’s will? All of a sudden, she saw Kĩsũũngũ the bull cattle resting under nearby shed chewing and chewing and he was really enjoying it. Waghaghu asked the bull, hello chief, have you ever crossed this river? How deep is it?

Kĩsũũngũ assured the hare that the river is not deep, that he has made several trips across the Kiluma river. He even bragged that sometimes he does it with his eyes closed against the direction of flow of the river. Waghaghu got highly motivated and started to move towards the river with intention to cross it. She could even see very young ducklings having fun crossing the river.

Before she could get into the river, porcupine stopped her to enquire what they were talking about with bull. The hare explained that she wanted to cross the river but first decided to ask for the bull’s counsel since she was second guessing herself. However, she seemed highly determined to cross after the motivational speech from Kĩsũũngũ. The porcupine decided to share her testimony with Waghaghu anyway, claiming that even though the same bull advised her that the river was not deep, she almost lost her life to the crocodiles after the furious rapids spared her soul.

Confused Waghaghu stood on two legs (rodents’ signature pose) wondering whom to trust.

Be that as it may

To know if the river is safe for you, you need to know your height first. Additional features like webbed feet and oily coated feathers could be an added advantage.

Same way to know if getting married young is a good idea or not, you really need to know yourself first. I know several people who got married very young. As early as less than 25 years old.

Some think it is a great experience, growing up together, learning through various mistakes, spending quality time together before having their kids. Some brag of how fulfilling it is to see you children get married, see their grandchildren grow and spent a lot of time with them.

Some believe it could have been better if they had waited to marry later when they are emotionally and financially muscular.

For those who get married later in life

Some may term it great since they have accomplished some career ambitions, trying different passions, doing various solo events which could otherwise been unattainable if they had married earlier.

Others are of the opinion that maybe it would have been better if they married earlier as they miss those many memories and time together.

Then there is the lot that feels getting married is just a scam. That marrying young is like leaving a party at 8 p.m. while marrying old is giving up at an old age while marrying at all is sentencing yourself to some ‘life imprisonment’. After all, the primary cause for divorces is marriage.

The bottom-line is…

The fact that you need to get married at some specific age in time is a big myth in itself which is mistakenly up to date enforced in many societies.

Marry when you are ready.

Marry when you are able to grant your partner what (s)he wants from you.

Marry when you can afford kids. Your kids deserve the best, they did not ask to be born, you have the power to make that decision. Being a bad or good parent to them, begins with your decision to get them.

Marry when you feel passionate about it.

Divorce is always an option, the myth of my rib, created for me alone is misplaced and ignorant. Don’t die because of some vow. People change their mind from time to time.

Best still, you can decide not to marry at all. Paul Njoroge, Roman Catholic Popes and priest, St. Paul, even Christ have led the path before you.

OPINION By ©Mũtai C.N, First of His Name